What do our dreams mean?
I am going to share something very personal. Something I do not usually do here in this format to be sure. But I feel strongly about this and figured it is not like identifying info or anything and would really like to talk about it.
So here it goes; I had a dream the other night. This was not a dream like the type of dream I usually have had. Usually my dreams can seem real, but good or bad, they end and I find myself either wishing it had not ended or glad I woke up.
This dream was as real as any dream could possibly be. It was so real I have a part of my brain that wonders if it was a glimpse into the future. (and I did not watch "flash forward" right before bed! lol) Let me give a little background. Several family members and people close to me have succumbed to cancer in the past 10 years. Cancer is an evil menace and I do not take the mention of it lightly. I do not joke about things like this and so this dream is freaking me out.
Again, this dream felt very real, as if it really happened to me. I went to a doctor because I had a lot of pain in my side or something. I must of had some things checked out prior to this doctor visit because the dream was about the conversation with the doctor.
He sat and took a deep breath. Then he proceeded to tell me I had a large tumor. It was larger than anything he had ever seen before and was amazed I had not had more problems prior to coming in about it. He said it was so advanced that there were not a lot of options but proceeded to go over them with me anyway.
The rest of the day(in the dream) is still so clear to me. Spouse and I decided that with not much of a chance of survival, the best thing to do would be to make the most of the time I had left. It would be better than being sick the rest of my life just to extend it a little while. It was the scariest thing I have ever been a part of. I am not ready to leave my family. The emotional drain of that day, the day that didn't even happen, has been weighing on me a lot. Everything that I have not done yet in this life flashed in front of my eyes. I thought of everything that I have not experienced with my children yet. There are still stages of life I have not reached and experienced. But what makes me any better than the thousands who die every year who can say the same things?
And then I am awake.............................at the end of that day........................................like I just woke up back in time before it happened.
Very X-Files-ish wouldn't you say?
Well, I just had to write it down. If you have any ideas please share them. I am not fatalistic but am still pretty weirded out by it.
Have you ever had a dream that was so real you can still remember every detail of it to this day? What was it about? Did it change the way you looked at life or how you lived?
Thanks for your comments and.........Have a great day!