Okay, I am stepping out of my box just a bit. No, I am not playing some kind of mind or word game but just want to talk frankly.
Life is hard. There, I said it. Anyone want to disagree with that statement? Anyone?
What is interesting is that at every stage I have ever been at in life, that stage had it's problems and there were things I was struggling with. And then, later on, I would look back and realize that I grew because of those struggles or I was not really struggling as much as I had originally thought.
Do any of you find that is the case with you?
I know that problems I am dealing with currently: recent lay off, financial issues, repossession etc are serious and have caused many a sleepless night over the last few weeks especially. My REAL problem? I know that these are none of what really and truly matters. But I cannot convince myself to take things in stride.
I really do believe that we are only here on earth for a short time in eternities time frame. And yet, I cannot get rid of the dark thoughts that insist on intruding into my head. You know the ones; I'm a failure and things would be better if I was just out of the picture. I know better than this and I still cannot completely dispell the sense of failure every time I think of what my family is going without.
I don't really know what direction I am heading....in life or in this blog post......just that I do have a deep conviction that I can deal with whatever is dealt to me. But because
I realize that I have only fallen half way down to where I am certainly heading, I dread the day to day.
Add having to deal with all that still has to be dealt with (schools asking for more and more money for kids activities for example) it is daunting. With a steady but underpaid job I am kept busy and that is good, but there are those moments when everything is off at night...........It is a madness....
Thank goodness for the ipod.......I do not know what I would do if I could not fill the silence and keep out the dread.
Well, enough venting I suppose. Thanks for visiting the blog and hopefully we will keep up more regularly with y'all.
So by the way, how did you like the guest blogger recently? I thought it was a great success and hope to have her back. If anyone has other ideas for guest bloggers, let me know.
Have a great day stalkers!