While I think I have had a pretty good attitude through the whole layoff thing I think I am mentally starting to hit "the wall".
And I am feeling really terrible for my down and out feelings. Guilty even. I have really come to grips with the fact that the lord allows us to have trials in order to test us. I really do believe that how we face diversity is what really defines us.
Through all the emotional ups and downs through the last month, I have kept it pretty well together. I even allowed myself to be happy on occasion. But now, even with the cuts, there are more needed. We are now actually living the way we told ourselves we could. And do not get me wrong, I do know that we could be even worse off. (never ever, ever, never say out loud "can it get any worse?!")
Bills are due and past due and we decide what is important NOW, and what can wait(as if money will magically appear later) Anyway, My Internet access is one of the things that had to go. It is a luxury and a convenience, but not necessary.(sure it is, lol, but hence the reason for such bad blog stalking lately)
So we at my house have started making lists. Lots and lots of lists. One of those lists are the things we decided are the must pays. The things that we feel need to be paid before anything else. Obviously, church tithes and Mortgage top the list. There are only a few other items on this MUST PAY list. And then of course we have lists of debts, and lists of wants. Then we have lists of needs, whether we can afford them all or not.
Funny how when you really investigate your needs, most of them are just wants. Something to think about, no?
So, of course I want to know what ya'll think. Do you make lists? What kind of lists do you make? And last but not least, tell me your biggest want in life, hint, not a need, but a want. Like a dream or desire from the bottom of your consciousness.
Okay, well, I will see you soon,